Valentine’s Day is coming up, and while that usually conjures images of heart-shaped chocolate boxes, romantic dinners, plush teddy bears, and bouquets of flowers, the Brookfield Zoo is taking a more unconventional approach to the holiday.

For anyone whose feelings toward a former love interest are less than warm, the Brookfield Zoo sees you and is letting you do something about it. Back for 2025, the name-a-cockroach program offers scorned lovers the opportunity to give their exes what they deserve. For fifteen dollars, you can name a Madagascar hissing cockroach after a particularly vile ex. It goes without saying that cockroaches are—to put it lightly—unpleasant, but the Madagascar hissing roach is especially egregious, reaching up to three inches in length and emitting a harsh hissing sound to ward off predators. In other words, it’s a pretty fitting embodiment of a match that turned sour.

Your donation will get you an official Certificate of Naming that you can fill out and share, hang on your refrigerator, or mount on your wall. You'll also receive placement on the Cockroach Naming Board posted outside of the Hamill Family Play Zoo. Don't worry, though—only the first names of the individual(s) you list will be posted. The board will be unveiled at the zoo on the morning of February 14th, and photos will be posted on Brookfield Zoo's social media channels for all to see. Note that for names to be included on the Cockroach Naming Board, donation submissions must be completed by 5pm on Wednesday, February 5, 2025.

Of course, there is another angle here, and that’s the one for people who might just be fascinated by the infamous insect. In that case, naming a hissing cockroach after your current love interest is a pretty romantic gesture. After all, flowers and chocolates may come and go, but roaches are forever.

At the end of the day, whether you want to spite a former ex or show your partner how much you care, it’s all for a good cause. Proceeds from the name-a-roach program support the zoo and the animals in its care. Here's hoping you don't see your own name on Cockroach Naming Board this year!

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